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Older men desire the biggest age gap, searching for women as much as 11 years younger.Women’s tolerance of older men decreases with age, reports the survey.Carol Mutesi also agrees that age is a big factor when it comes to who she dates and insists that she cannot date younger men because from experience, they are a burden.“They are insecure, clingy, attention seekers and they are also rumormongers. If you are looking for a fling, they are okay but if it’s something serious; don’t waste your time,” she says. Emmanuel Karegyesa is a Pastor at Eglise Anglican Au Rwanda (EAR) and he says that there are several things to consider if the relationship is genuine.“Age is having grown up in a certain culture, having certain shared experiences and also having certain kinds of bodies. If you have a mature outlook to life and share my values, I can go with the adage that says that age is just but a number. What matters is the maturity level and whether we understand each other.While some lucky people escape the ravages of age effects, it is a very rare individual who is 60 who is the body of a 30 year old.” Once the sex hormones die down, people far apart in age can lose their emotional connection, says relationship expert Walsh. Otherwise, I certainly wouldn’t date a woman five years older than me or fifteen years younger. If we are compatible, then I don’t see why it should be a problem at all. If a man is responsible, hardworking, caring and cultured, I wouldn’t care if he is 10 years older or younger than me.While there’s “no perfect age gap, an age gap is more beneficial to men than women,” says Wendy Walsh, who runs a relationship site called “Seven to nine years in either direction is doable without any big issues, but once you start getting to 15 or 20 years age difference, it’s naïve to think that problems aren’t going to arise,” says the relationship expert at
It’s never about the age, but the level of maturity that one carries.Kibirango, however, says that the Bible encourages Biblical marriage and doesn’t put emphasis on age.Joyce Kirabo, a counselor who deals with relationship and marriage issues says that age is a matter of contention since society views it based on gender.Holding a conversation for longer than 10 minutes without reverting to small talk is quite something.I honestly can’t see how a 20-year-old will offer me that,” she says.
“When a young lady marries someone much older, the assumption is that she is with him for financial reasons and that he is with her because she is easy to control.