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It doesn’t matter how passionate the sex with the ‘other man’ in her life is, she is not leaving her husband.
Usually at the beginning of such an arrangement, when the triangle is young so to speak, the ‘other man’ usually tells himself he likes this arrangement because he doesn’t have to make a commitment.
A lot of misery is avoided with a respectful ending and opportunity to start again with someone else after a period of sincere efforts to fix a love relationship.
The point is, a triangle happens when two married (or simply committed people) don’t fix their marriage.
Instead defensive stuff happens like distancing from each other or finding another lover to make up for what is not happening in the marriage.
The problem is you can’t get a piece of what you need from one person and another piece from someone else and expect to have a stable and satisfying love-life. What you get instead is fragmentation, conflict, and limited intimacy.
The target of desire in the relationship is the woman. Her husband is not leaving and she is not letting him go (otherwise she wouldn’t need a triangle to cope). It doesn’t matter how negative wife and husband feel about each other, they are together.Triangles exist simply because a problem is not being resolved in a marriage.Two people get married and have marital problems, instead of resolving those problems either by fixing the relationship or ending it, which by the way can be a valid resolution of a problem, a third party is brought into the relationship, and now you have a triangle.Then he can go after a whole and available single woman. He’s the ‘other man’s’ competition, but not really.The important thing about the married man is he’s probably coping with his limited marriage by doing something else (work, alcohol, substances, whatever consumes and distracts him).
His superficial belief that he wants someone else’s woman for the convenience is a lie he defensively tells himself.